Can you become a superior man? What does that even look like? Can you live at your edge at all times? Superior men mean the best version of yourself. The divorce rate is higher than 50 percent and still climbing for most countries in the Western world. Most times after the divorce, the children stay with a single mom. We are a generation raised by women, and countless single moms tried their very best.
David Deida has some great insights into claiming your masculinity and becoming what he calls a superior man. The first piece of advice is that you have to enjoy her drama when you’re with a woman. The advisors respond to her drama with love and humor. She will thank you later for it.
Your girl needs to see you being on your purpose when she’s with you. She advises a woman cannot feel attraction towards a man who has no purpose in life. Just imagine yourself being on the way to fulfilling your life purpose and her swirling and circling you with her femininity.
10 Notes From The Way Of The Superior Man
Let’s say your goal in life is to become a pro baseball player. This creates attraction for the feminine, and women will test you. So keep in mind that when she tests you because women only test what they laugh at. The world is a great leader in every area of life. It does not mean being abusive or controlling. It means that you decide to decide about more and more things in the relationship.
Let’s discover the best ideas/lessons from this book.
There’s masculine and feminine, and these are two energies at play. You have a positive side of a magnet and the negative side of the magnet, and they attract each other together. The more charged they are, the stronger the attraction is. Masculine and feminine energy does not mean male and female. You can have a very feminine male attracted to a very masculine female.
You can have a very masculine man to a very feminine woman. But whatever the opposite is based on how strong their charges are. This is great because once we identify that, it’s two halves that make up a whole frequently, with polarities in life all around us.
- Be natural and power up the masculine energy.
- We can start learning from the other person in their perspective.
It’s cool to have two different viewpoints together to broaden your perspective. At the end of the day, if you can grow more alone than with the person you’re with shouldn’t be in that relationship. Then there’s no point to it.
So that’s what this book is about is dancing with that polarity, the tension of the masculine energy. It sometimes operates differently, not right or wrong, as different as night and day.
According to data, 10 percent of couples are neutral. Ten percent are made up of a feminine man and a masculine woman, 80 percent masculine and feminine. You are always attracted to your sexual reciprocal. So the takeaway here is to choose a woman who is your complementary opposite.
2. Stop hoping for completion
Stop living this moment in preparation for the one-day finish line mentality. Look back on middle school and be like we had it so good. But in college, you’re so stressed out about what’s next. We don’t enjoy it.
Stop hoping for completion means striving that men fall into, especially with the ego and achieving and business success that constantly hits the gas pedal. What’s next will take away from your joy and happiness in life.
- To stop hoping for completion, start whatever you want today.
- Ditch the success fantasies and get on the path of bringing all awareness to the now and the here.
A good point here is on success fantasies. The initial phase of the grind of a startup takes so long. It’s almost more enjoyable to have that fantasy in your head of how it’ll all be better one day. It is projecting outwards more pleasurable than the process to get there.
3. Live out your real edge
Don’t fake. The best quote in the book is Honorable for a man to admit his fierce resistance and edge for practice. It is simply true that each man has a limit, capacity for growth, and destiny. But it is dishonorable for him to lie to himself and others about his real place. He shouldn’t pretend he is more enlightened than he is, nor should he stop short of his actual edge.
- The more a man is playing his real edge, the more valuable he is.
- Grow your personality and be real.
As good company for other men, the more he can be trusted to be authentic and fully present. A man’s edge is less important than whether he is living his edge. In truth, rather than being lazy and deluded, he then goes. Go on to say, uncleaned beyond your edge, a man’s growth is optimized in any given moment.
If he leans beyond his edge, capacity, and fear, he should not be too lazy, happily stagnating the security and comfort zones. Men should lean beyond their edge of fear and discomfort constantly and everything.
4. Fixed mindset
If you’re a man, never change your mind. This doesn’t mean not listening to their opinion and making an educated decision moving forward. So the way never changes your mind to please your woman, whoever means listen to yourself. Because if now you’re going from your truth, ideas, and it fails, you get that feedback failure. But if you never listen to yourself, you won’t get that feedback.
- Listen to yourself, grow confidence and satisfy your woman.
- Never change your ethics, and keep strong your mindset.
On the other side, you won’t get the confidence when something works. So now it’s double-sided because you won’t get the feedback to learn, and you won’t get the confidence to learn.
5. Discover your purpose
It goes back to one of the oldest concepts in philosophy: Know thyself. It’s a kind of self-actualization and Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. It is what gets talked about over and over again. Martin Seligman, the founder of Positive Psychology Authentic Happiness, said after studying tens of thousands of people. How do we make them happier?
- Discover your goals, design your future and work hard.
- Do something new and creative every day.
- Convert your depression into strength.
We’ve gotten good at bringing people up from depression and getting them to a baseline where they can function. But we’re not so good at taking people from baseline and raising their happiness as high as possible. He said that the secret to doing that was to know your strengths and use them often. So he created his signature strength test. Let’s change that to discover your strengths and start using them.
6. Enjoy your friend’s criticism
David Datta says that we need to enjoy criticism. It’s like Napoleon Hill’s concept of a mastermind. When you get a room of people together, they can give you honest, constructive criticism on how to change things. They’re not only able to give you pointers on how you can change. But you can get 20, 40, 100, 200 years of wisdom, insights from all the people in the room.
- Don’t react to any criticism and enjoy it.
- If you are an alpha or beta male, then analyze the criticism and improve them.
Add it up together, and you’re able to tap into that. It’s a way faster way to change approach if something’s not working, welcoming criticism and welcoming feedback. It is all great stuff. We shouldn’t run from it or get defensive as most people do.
Most people hear criticism and assume it’s brought up politely. It is because there is a difference between giving criticism and insulting someone. If you’re tactfully giving criticism, they’re trying to say something helpful.
7. Do not use your family as an excuse
There are two options. If you want to live a life you’ve always dreamed of, don’t use an excuse. Robert Kiyosaki said, instead of saying, I can’t afford it, start asking yourself, how can I afford it? That was a cool point because you distinguish how can I afford it going from, I can’t afford it.
- Don’t blame your family or other problem because everybody is a gamechanger.
- Short out your limitations and find a better solution.
- You can start slowly but keep it in specific motion and don’t give up.
Now, you’re coming up with solutions. But if you let yourself stay in that, I can’t afford a fence. You’re never going to be able to afford it because that’s a trap. That’s a mindset that’s locking you there in the first place.
You have to rid yourself of the expectations your parents set on you. If you want to live a unique life, you need to stop looking to your parents for affirmation. That doesn’t mean you don’t love them. It doesn’t mean you don’t value their opinions. It means you need to source your decision.
8. Responsible man
Data says a woman needs to feel that she can get on her train and go where she wants. You need to know where you are heading and how you are getting there financially and spiritually. You don’t need to make all the money globally but show responsibility for finances. That’s more than work. Data claims that while your goal may enjoy seeing you relax has become another part of her wants to feel more like you’re in complete control.
- Take care of your girlfriend/wife, behave softly and keep them happy.
- Know your woman’s desires, problems, actions, hobby so that you can easily handle them.
She wants to feel the fullness of your presence, the invasion of her body by consciousness. Most guys don’t want to penetrate or ravish their woman after ejaculation or two. You no longer feel desire with your woman’s consent. Data articulately say why she should expose her most profound part. A woman will sense it and be able to relax in the force of your loving.
There’s an exercise you can practice to avoid premature ejaculation. It will allow you to convert your orgasm. So instead of shooting out your feelings, you shoot the energy up your spine for a potent bodily explosion instead of a shallow orgasm. Ultimately, you need to figure out your purpose and evaluate the consequences of your actions.
9. Hear her complaints like warning bells
When a woman nags you in a relationship or is constantly getting on your case about specific issues, let’s go to the dishes one. You don’t do it. What she’s saying is to get it together by use telling her something. It’s not that you didn’t put away the dishes. She can’t trust the deeper message there that you don’t hold up doing what you say. That is the more concerning part than dishes on the sink. It’s not that you didn’t clean the garage two weeks ago. You didn’t hold up the integrity that you said you would do it.
- Give attention to her and listen carefully through eye contact.
- Note down her complaints and sort out them wisely.
So, in turn, that means you don’t prioritize her. It’s always the deeper meaning. So her complaints as warning bells, every time she’s nagging, every time she’s complaining. Try to take it at the deeper layer instead of the surface layer. Try to read it as her trying to improve you through challenges, not constantly nagging and being a constant burden.
10. Your purpose must come before the relationship
Suppose a man prioritizes his relationship over his highest purpose. In that case, he weakens himself, disserves the universe, and cheats his woman for an authentic man who can offer her full, undivided presence.
- Don’t neglect her and always give her first priority.
- Never change your mind to play as a woman.
You should always listen to your woman and then make your own decision. If you choose to go with your woman’s suggestion, you feel that another decision is wiser. You are weakening yourself by telling yourself this. You are also weakening your woman’s trust in you. Why should she trust your wisdom if you don’t?
If you’ve read the book, add something to the comments if you would like to develop further and improve.
David goes over that men tend to grow through challenges in the book. Also, men tend to get off on that challenge. He says that women grow through praise. They have the complete opposite wiring that you need to praise them and often encourage them. You need to give them constant affirmations and compliments.
If you want them to grow and continue to flourish, emphasize the praise. As data says, a superior man wants his girlfriend/wife to move in the direction most says her growth, love, and happiness. If you’re not growing, you’re dying. That includes a relationship with your woman.
Download: The way of the superior man notes pdf
Author: David Deida
Average Customer Review: (4.7 out of 5, on Amazon)
Category: Self-Improvement, Social Skills, Management, Motivation, Relationship
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